So this one is not going to be all about physical fitness, but also my metal fitness. It is more of a blowing off steam, planning, and goals that I need to achieve. I just thought I would give you fair warning before you read it and look into my life.
As of yesterday, I had only lost 8lbs since my Dr. visit in April. I am not excited about that. I weighed myself this morning at work at was at 218.5 lbs, am not excited about this either.
I need to work harder, eat better, not make “slip-ups”. I need to work out every night, even if only for 20 minutes of cardio…I have to do it every night. I have committed myself to working out with my son 2 nights a week at the gym, which will be lifting (he is into the chest/tri’s, back/bi’s, shoulder lifting). So the other days of the week will be at home using EA Active doing cardio or resistance bands.
I have to drink more water. I have been doing a-lot better over the past few weeks. I just have to keep it up. No more slip-ups on diet soda or extra iced coffees during the day. I will drink my coffee in the morning and water the majority of the day. I will have Green Tea with Honey (will watch how much) in the evening time just before bed. No more snacking just before bed either, no crackers or anything. The only snack will be my protein drink (smoothie or other concoction) after my workout.
I have to re-commit myself to this. I have to. After looking at the photos taken last week, I know it can be done…I just have to force myself to make it habit. I was feeling better about the route that I was taking, but I still give in to things way to easy. I still blow off a work out too easy. I can not let myself do this. I have to be strong willed and “REFUSE to GIVE-UP”.
All of that being said, I also have to look at my metal health. I am stressed beyond belief at work/home/freelance. It is a killer in me. I work so hard to try and make things better, but I let everything collide and it all builds up and just sits there. While I am working out, either at home or with Devon, I feel like a weight has been lifted. I don’t think about anything else that has to be/get done. I feel relieved for that small amount of time.
My wife it great! She loves me unconditionally and does so much for us. I feel that I don’t always repay that greatness to her. I try to though, at least I think I do. She keeps the finances straight, or as straight as they can be. She takes care of so much around the house and keeps me on my toes.
Finances – We pay everything on time, we are not behind, but we are not ahead either. I want us to be ahead and that is where the freelance work comes in. However, it causes even more stress. I have a hard time keeping home/work seperated. I just started reading “When Work and Family Collide: Keeping Your Job from Cheating Your Family” by Andy Stanley. This was recommended to me by a good friend who owns his own side business as well. In my opinion it all comes down to time management and sacrifices. However, I don’t want my family to feel like I am sacrificing them. It is a hard/fine line to walk.
Home – Other than the finances, we live in a small condo, in a not so great neighborhood. We own the condo, but alot of the other units in the neighborhood are used a rentals and that along with our HOA not being the greatest and ran by alot of the older residents that don’t really care, keeps the neighborhood from being worth anything financially.
We have been doing projects around our home to try and upgrade our surroundings and try to make it more likely to sale when we do get to a place to sell. However, I run out of steam and have several unfinished projects. I need to get them going, I have to make a list of what to get accomplished. Therefore, if you see a page/link on my blog to projects, it is more thank likely the list of things that I need to do at home and will get updated as I accomplish things. I will use this as a tool to show myself that I am doing things. Hopefully (and according to my wife it will) this will help me deal with the stress. I think it will help Libbie with the stress that she feels in on her shoulders as well.
Freelance – Ok, I am 21 hours shy of my Bachelors Degree in New Media Arts and Sciences. Due to finances, it will be a while before I get back to school to finish.
However, I do some work as a freelance webdesigner/developer. I am not great by any means, but I bring in a few extra dollars each month doing it. I am trying to get my personal site up and running. It is coming along slowly, but coming along none the less. I have a facebook page set up for myself “Barefoot Visions“. I may add a page to this blog as well for that. It may help me keep better organized and help the stress level there as well. I have alot of customer updates that I need to get orgainzed.
Work – Other than my home/freelance work, I have my regualar, everyday job. I work for a company that does the graphics and signage for several large sporting events. We develop the “look/feel” of the events and produce the graphics and signage. We used to do alot of the print/bindery of smaller jobs, but we outsource that to another local printing firm. I currently am in the role of “Design Client Service Rep or DCSR”. I am a go between for the designers, account/project managers, and the clients. I also fill in for the Traffic Manger in ensuring that all jobs stay on production timeline and make sure that the designers accomplish what has to be done.
I have been working the past 6 months on getting transffered out of creative services to what we call the “Events” team. I want to become a project manager and was told back in February that it would happen. I was led to believe that it would happen by now. I have not been getting alot of feedback from my upper managment on the status of this move, so I asked the other day. I was told that all personnel changes have been placed on hold due to a client restructering. Knowing this client, I am not sure how that affects my change. That ticks me off a little and I feel that I am being fed a line of BS. Whether that is the case or not is yet to be seen, but regardless, it took the wind out of my sails.
So that is my life at the moment. My blog is title “Fitness Journey”. Fitness is more than just the physical, it is mental as well. I need to get it all in check before I can say that I am doing the right things.